50 WAYS TO AVOID BEING MISERABLE
True happiness isn't just that burst of joy that comes with getting a promotion, getting engaged, or winning the lottery. Sustained happiness involves contentment and peace of mind, the feelings you want in between those big bursts. We all have a happiness set point, a baseline degree of a happiness determined by genetics. However, there are many decisions that diminish our feelings of happiness and make it more difficult to move past our set point on the happiness scale. Constantly reliving the pain of the past keeps you mired in negativity, guilt, anger, and sadness.
Keep your mind focused on the present moment and all the good available to you right now. Exercise and movement boost endorphins, provide energy and build self-esteem — all happiness-fostering outcomes. And of course, exercise contributes to good health which is the number one contributor to happiness. Happy people aren't alone. They enjoy time with family, friends, and work associates. They make a point of connecting and interacting with others. Isolation breeds loneliness and depression.
Whether you're happy or not, bad things will happen in life. But after a time of grief or frustration, happy people don't continue to focus on the negative. They consciously move past negative situations and thoughts and intentionally focus on the positive.
The secret of happiness? Stop feeling bad about being unhappy
Money difficulties and the resulting anxiety and stress that go along with them poison feelings of happiness. It's hard to feel happy when you owe a lot of money. Happy people spend less than they make and pay off their debts. Material things afford only a short burst of happiness, but this quickly fades. Experiences, however, provide a richer level of satisfaction that lingers through connections and memories.
We all get angry or frustrated with other people, but staying angry and holding a grudge is like dropping a cold, wet blanket over our joy.
As we dwell on our anger or how we've been wronged, we allow no room for happy feelings. Forgiveness and letting go of other's offenses is the only way to stay happy. Expressing gratitude is one of the top happiness-producing habits we can form. When you forget to be grateful for all that you have right now, you're denying yourself a well-spring of joyful feelings. Happy people make a point of counting their blessings. So often we believe happiness comes from having others behave the way we want them to behave.
We think they can make us happy by saying certain things, meeting all of our needs, or giving us what we want. But of course, other people can't make us happy and thinking they can only contributes to our unhappiness. Continue growing and learning When we stop expanding ourselves through personal growth and learning, we remain stuck in the status quo.
We paralyze ourselves so we aren't able to experience new adventures, ideas, people, and self-awareness. This leads to stagnation and depression. Helping our family, friends, and even strangers we never see is a huge key to happiness. Service to others gives us a feeling of deeper purpose and meaning in life. It boosts our feelings of connection and self-esteem. When you avoid serving, you cut yourself off from a deep longing of the soul.
Being overweight drags down your self-esteem and confidence. It makes you feel unattractive and unlovable. And of course, it's bad for your health, which is a huge contributor to happiness. A great exercise for health and fitness is rebounding. When your life is out-of-balance, you suffer because important parts of who you are and what you value aren't getting the attention they need or deserve. Your work, relationships, and lifestyle all need to work in harmony so you can feel whole and emotionally and mentally healthy. Talking bad about other people is an insidious habit that is hurtful to others and to yourself.
You demean and diminish yourself when you take pleasure in the pain, difficulties, or bad behavior of others. When you are happy and confident , you don't need to gossip. We all have imperfect faces and bodies. Some people have more than others. Happy people do what they can to improve their appearance , but after that they let it go. If you focus on your physical flaws, you diminish your self-esteem and undermine the real person you are on the inside.
The secret of happiness? Stop feeling bad about being unhappy | Tim Lott | Opinion | The Guardian
If your time outside consists of walking from your house or office to your car, then you're limiting an important experience of contentment and joy. Truly happy people find an almost spiritual joy in time spent outside in beautiful, natural settings. Failing is part of life. It is necessary for learning and success. We all feel bad about a mistake or failure, but happy people know how to learn from these events and then let them go. Being judgmental of others brings out negative and controlling feelings and thoughts. Judgment can make you feel angry, superior, and self-satisfied — but none of these emotions are compatible with happiness.
People who are happy and content don't buy in to the old stories and limiting beliefs they may once have had about themselves. They are able to re-write their stories and come to love themselves as they are right now. It's hard to be happy when you aren't living your truth, when you are trying to be someone else, or please others at the expense of your true self.
Happy people give up people pleasing and embrace their authenticity. Life can get busy and overwhelming, and sometimes we get addicted to the adrenaline-fueled lifestyle of busy schedules and full to-do lists. But this adrenaline addiction does a number on your health, peace of mind, and relationships — all of which are necessary for happiness.
When we're too afraid or too busy to go to the doctor, we're creating a subtle layer of stress and potentially harming our health. Taking care of our bodies is part of loving ourselves, and self-love is imperative for a happy life. One of the top five regrets of the dying is not spending enough time with the people they care about. We are social creatures, wired to connect and interact with others. When you prioritize work above your loved ones, you're denying yourself and them of the joy of time together.
It has been proven that just the physical act of smiling, even when you don't feel happy, will boost the happiness chemicals in your brain. When you rarely smile, you're sending signals to your brain that you are unhappy. When you take yourself too seriously and can't laugh at yourself, you appear and feel grouchy and unpleasant. The ability to laugh at yourself is attractive and authentic and makes you feel light and confident.
People who are happy want to enjoy life. They want to have fun and share that fun with others. But you have to make time for fun. You have to prioritize it and give yourself permission to enjoy the fun. Your primary love relationship is the most important relationship of your life. If you don't take care of that relationship, you are bound to be unhappy. People with happy marriages are happier people in general.
Your physical space is a reflection of your state of mind. Feeling cluttered and out-of-control diminishes your joy by adding stress, distractions, and overwhelm. You may want to check out my bestselling book 1o-Minute Declutter. Those who seek to know themselves and work on self-improvement will experience happiness and contentment on a much deeper level.
The self-aware life opens many new pathways to joy. If you've hurt or offended someone and forget to apologize, it will feel like a thorn in your side until you remedy the situation. Letting others take advantage of you and cross your boundaries eventually shreds your self-esteem and peace of mind. As long as you tolerate these offenses, you'll feel unsettled and angry. A huge part of living a fulfilled and happy life is finding your calling — the thing you are meant to do.
Commerce thrives on unhappiness. I am not an advocate for misery — far from it. Happiness is good for you and for those around you — there is no greater favour you can do for loved ones than show them your happiness. The daily parade of disaster on the news is sobering enough. The fact of my own mortality is a downer. Old age and sickness frighten me. The difficulties of human communication produce as much isolation as connection.
The corruption and venality of the powerful are daily reminders of the ubiquitous nature of injustice.
The lot of most people in this country who simply work and work harder and harder in order to spend, or simply survive, strikes me as profoundly un-jolly. Once it was respectable to listen Morrissey and Ian Curtis without being thought of as a loser. The lugubrious Tony Hancock and Leonard Rossiter were national heroes.
Here's 50 ways to be happy always:
There is no equivalent today. We can, it is suggested, find happiness through good works. This is also an ideology. The secret truth is that being unselfish can leave you just as empty as being selfish. It would simply be a form of hedonism. I am sincerely glad that we have all cheered up since the s and s. One of the main barriers to satisfaction is the demand that you be happy — for we add another layer of unhappiness to our lives if we feel we are failing in what is deemed to be its primary purpose.
The UN now has an International Happiness Day during which we are all instructed to be happy on pain of being branded a sad sack or general all-purpose wet blanket. There is plenty of evidence that cheerfulness is not fuelling the zeitgeist quite as much as we suppose. Depressive illness is at record levels. Children are stressed like never before, as are teachers. Suicide is the main cause of death for men under There is plenty of unhappiness to go around. Why dwell on it? TV and the internet disseminate a form of propaganda by insisting on and showcasing shiny, creative, fulfilling lives.
It makes me feel inadequate because my life, although creative, and fulfilling and quite well paid, does not send me into paroxysms of ecstasy every day.